RELATIONSHIP TIP OF THE WEEK: Move from Complaint to Request

[Amy Warren, LMHC / WQ Mag Columnist]

For all of those things you want to complain about in your relationship, change the complaints to requests. Requests are present or future-oriented which is what really matters anyway. Complaints are about what has already happened. The present is where we should be living; after all, we can’t change the past and hanging onto the negatives from it won’t do any good either.

Requesting your partner to do something is much more likely to generate a positive response from your partner than a complaint. If you utilize this one simple tool in your relationship, it will make a world of difference. It will also likely remove any image your husband or partner has of you as a nag. To read more about making requests in relationships, read my article on this site “Are You Nagging…”

[Doug Ross]

Men do like direct requests or questions with concrete answers. An example: When I ask somebody out to eat, I have several places I'm very happy to go, so I want to hear some ideas about what she likes or doesn't like. Let's agree to someplace we both enjoy!